Panama!

By: Jeremy | August 27th, 2009

In honor of the Champions League match versus Arabe Unido in Panama, I’m giving you a game review as if written by David Lee Roth.

Uh-huh! It’s Diamond Dave here talkin’ soccer. Oh yeah!

Jump back! What’s that sound? It’s the Dynamo, full blast and top down. What’s that? Eleven yellow cards? Ow! Five red cards? Uh-oh!

Kei Kamara scored the game’s first goal in the 69th minute. You know what I’m sayin’. He’s got a feel for the wheel and keeps the movin’ parts clean. Woo! Pistons poppin’, ain’t no stoppin’ now!

Andrew Hainault, Corey Ashe, and Stuart Holden left the show early. They got bounced, baby! Red cards! Yeah, things were runnin’ a little bit hot tonight. Model citizens, zero discipline.

Uh-oh! Hot shoe, burnin’ down the avenue. It’s Orlando Rodriguez with a late goal. Panama! Ow!

Almost done but the lights go out. Uh-oh! Slight delay. Let me entertain you with an ah-oh-oh-oh-oh!

Game over. It’s a tie. Did I say tie? Hey, I wish they all could be California girls, but this will surely do! Whoa!

Sincerely,
Diamond Dave

P.S.- Ladies, I’m your ice cream man. Stop me when I’m passin’ by. All my flavors are guaranteed to satisfy. Oh yeah!

For a less entertaining but more informative review, go here.

FOREVER ORANGE

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Comments   |  Add your comment

• Laurie |  August 27th, 2009 at 8:24 am

  
  
  

  I note that you used the picture of young, somewhat good-looking DLR rather than the current, rode-hard-put-away-wet version. (That’s my cowgirl reference, just for you Texas folk.) I guess we should thank you?

  P.S. I could not find a stream for this game ANYWHERE, and I really wanted to, too. Did I hear somewhere that the replay is on FSC tonight?

  Posted from United States

  

• Jeremy |  August 27th, 2009 at 8:27 am

  
  
  

  Yeah, it will be on tonight. It sounds like a pretty scrappy game. Probably better than the Cruz Azul/Columbus game they showed last night, even though I’m a Cruz Azul fan.

  Posted from United States

  

• Luka |  August 27th, 2009 at 9:03 am

  
  
  

  Forza Houston ties!!

  Posted from Australia

  

• Rex |  August 27th, 2009 at 12:13 pm

  
  
  

  I really wanna see if the ref was as bad as it sounded on the radio. The http://www.concacafchampions.com has a few highlights.

  Posted from United States

  

• Jeremy |  August 27th, 2009 at 12:29 pm

  
  
  

  Yeah, I like how the highlights show the Dynamo goal was scored by KEL Kamara. Nice job, Kel!

  Posted from United States

  

• Kym |  August 27th, 2009 at 3:28 pm

  
  
  

  Yeah, that Kel’s a beast. Can’t wait to see the replay tonight, I’m especially looking forward to watching coach Dom’s reaction to some of these calls. FORVER ORANGE (And lest we forget…Dallas sucks)

  Posted from United States

  

• Laurie |  August 27th, 2009 at 10:14 pm

  
  
  

  And…damn. Life wouldn’t let me watch the game. How was it?

  Posted from United States

  

• Jeremy |  August 28th, 2009 at 6:35 am

  
  
  

  The game was ridiculous. The ref completely lost control and let the players (Panama) persuade him into making decisions, like giving Corey Ashe a red card literally 3 minutes after the “foul”. Pathetic. I can’t wait to play them here.

  Posted from United States

  

• soccer goals |  August 28th, 2009 at 4:03 pm

  
  
  

  What an aggressive game.

  Posted from United States

  

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